The Confident Podcast
The Confident Podcast is your go-to source for mastering confidence and leadership. Hosted by Lisa Tarkington—Business & Life Coach, Keynote Speaker, and the visionary behind Lead—this podcast is designed to help you break free from self-doubt, conquer imposter syndrome, and step into your full potential.
Whether you’re an aspiring leader, a seasoned professional, or someone on a personal growth journey, The Confident Podcast offers the tools, strategies, and motivation you need to overcome challenges and achieve your goals. This isn’t just about listening—it’s about taking the next step in your journey to becoming an unstoppable force in your life and career.
Tune in, subscribe, and start your transformation today!
The Confident Podcast
EP 189 | Ask Lisa: Answering Your Questions from Imposter Syndrome to Building Confidence
We’re kicking off 2025 with another exciting ‘Ask Lisa’ episode! Kelsey Snyder, Director of Lead, is stepping in as guest host to ask Lisa Tarkington, some of your most pressing questions.
From overcoming imposter syndrome to building confidence, strengthening leadership, and achieving personal and professional growth, we’re diving into the topics that matter most to you.
The start of a new year brings endless possibilities—a blank slate to redefine your goals, step into your power, and become the person you’ve always known you could be.
Here’s the best part: Confidence isn’t something you’re born with—it’s a skill you can learn, practice, and strengthen. Tune in for actionable insights, inspiring perspectives, and practical tools to help you make 2025 your year of transformation.
Chapters:
- 0:00: Mastering Confidence and Leadership
- 4:30: Overcoming Self-Imposed Limitations and Goals
- 11:20: Embracing Change and Life Lessons
- 22:00: Building Trust and True Confidence
- 30:21: Navigating Self-Care and Role Modeling
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I think for a long time I was like, yep, I faked it and I made it. And now I'm on stage right because I do a lot of keynotes and I think that. But what I realized is that whole time people saw something in me, so it was never faking it. I was being authentic to who I was. I wasn't believing in my own confidence. Welcome to the Confident Podcast. I am Lisa Tarkington, your guide to mastering confidence and leadership. As the business and life coach, keynote speaker and the driving force behind LEAD, I am here to help you break free from self-doubt, silence the imposter syndrome and step into your power as the person you're meant to be. If you press play today, it's because you're ready for something bigger. Each week, I'll bring you real, raw conversations and actionable insights that will empower you to redefine your leadership, reclaim your confidence and transform into the unstoppable force you've always known that you could be. This isn't just another podcast. It's a journey we're on together, so buckle up and let's dive into this transformation. Your next level awaits.
Speaker 1:Hi, everybody, Welcome back for another episode of the Confident Podcast. It is 2025, and we are so excited to be just starting with you guys on a new year, are so excited to be just starting with you guys on a new year, fresh start, just kind of like setting the tone for maybe some goals that you have for yourselves, maybe some tips that I'll be able to give you to really start your year off and just help you gain your confidence. I bet over the holiday break we all have time to reflect, be with family, friends and just focus on what do we want for the next year, what do we want for ourselves. And if you've listened to the podcast over the year of 2024 and years prior, you've probably seen my transformation as well, and so I'm really excited to continue that journey with all of you guys this year and just be part of the community with you, Be there for you. However, you need me to. This is your guide. This is kind of, I say, our time together where I can give you tips and tools, but also I love hearing from different individuals who listen to the podcast and things that they need more of, things that they want to hear from us, and that's what we're doing today.
Speaker 1:We are taking questions that we hear all the time from you and bringing them to life with my answers. I get asked all the times, what are my recommendations, what are things that I do. And so we just took them all from the last couple of months of what we've been hearing and thought we'd put together another podcast. So I'm bringing back our director of lead, Kelsey Schneider, to be interviewing me, to be asking me questions and to we've done this, I think, in 2024, we did this once and we heard from people that they loved it. They loved having their questions be answered, so we thought we'd start 2025 off this way. So, Kelsey, I'm going to hand it off to you to get us started.
Speaker 2:We got some great questions. They span from personal development, leadership, confidence, wellbeing, people wanting to know what you're doing. So we'll kind of kick off in the personal development side. So what's one lesson that you learned recently that surprised you?
Speaker 1:What's one lesson that I learned recently that surprised me? So I'm going to go off of something that I reflected a lot on the holidays about, and I think my biggest lesson this last year was go deeper into the things that I'm really good at, versus going wider. So sometimes I get envious of like I wish I had that skill. I wish I had that skill and I've noticed that that was happening a lot in 2024 of like I want to be good at all the things and I think I also just had this like ego moment of like but I'm really good at these things and how to go deeper. So I think the lesson that I learned is like it's okay to go deeper in skills and not have to be good at everything, um, which is really tough for me for a long time, as you know, like working with me and everything.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. I think it can be hard for everybody, and when you do that, then you dilute the things that you're really good at. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:And like also to like I don't want to be decent at a lot of things. Like I had to really be think about like well, what do I want to be known for? And so I think the lesson really was is like if someone was to think of me and have a problem, what's the solution that I can fix? Because, like, I think about our skill set, like yours and mine complement each other, but they're very different, and there's solutions that you have that I'm like oh yeah. Yeah, didn't think of that Right, but that's how our brains work. So I think that was really cool for me to learn.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I like that. How do you identify and overcome something that's holding you back?
Speaker 1:Well, usually it's me holding myself back. So I'm just saying like so I would say I think I had a lot of reflection this last year of and honestly I think in just all the years, just like compiling is one of the things that I do to like really overcome when I'm like kind of struggling is I do a lot of reflection. The struggle with that is sometimes I don't always have the answer right away.
Speaker 2:It's hard to sit in that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh, because it's so uncomfortable and I had a lot of uncomfortable moments in 2024. But I think what it did was teach me to prepare for 2025 of, like I'm the one that's usually standing in my way, like when something's kind of in front of me, it's usually me that doesn't know like is it fear Right? Is it trust? Is it my ego? Like what's that kind of negative notation that's kind of holding me back?
Speaker 1:And so I think a lot of times this past year, I had to sit in the suck and I gave myself, you know, my 48 hour, 24 hour rule, whatever, but there were days where I'm like I just don't have the answer yet, and so sitting there. So I think that my, my point to anybody is, like reflection, don't always feel like you have to go do something because I'm a problem solution person, so I want to fix it now because it's just sitting there. Yeah, and I had a lot of conversations with my husband in 2024 and we literally just had one the other day because he was like you know, like you don't see your growth.
Speaker 2:I do, but I'm in my head trying to like fix it and make it better so, yeah, well, I think you're talking too about trust, like you have to trust yourself that you can sit in it and that you will. The path, will you know, reveal itself to you, but it might not right away, and and that's okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think it kind of goes back to like I am a recovering perfectionist, right, I have some imposter syndrome and I'm a control freak. Right, I have some imposter syndrome and I'm a control freak. I like I never was, and then you build a business and then you kind of like want to control things, and so I think that that's been also. Something too is like when you want to control everything, you can't, and that was I think I had to overcome, like really reflecting on like it, it's okay, right, and everything always works out. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:I love that. What's a small, unexpected action that can make a big impact in someone's personal growth.
Speaker 1:I would say so. I would say this um, first off, I think that we underestimate the power of um positive affirmations. It's very, very tedious, I think, but it's like we do it for a while, we feel good, we get into the groove and then we're like I'm good, I don't need it anymore, and so I think that comes with any action. So I would say, not giving up on yourself, I always say like we're our biggest critic, but we're also our biggest cheerleaders, and so you get a choice which one do you want to be?
Speaker 1:And so when I think of small steps, I really think about like being consistent, and the biggest changes I've seen in my growth is when I'm consistent Doesn't mean that it's perfect and like every day is wonderful, but I'm being consistent in my growth, versus going really hard for a month and then just be like I'm good now, because then you're burnt out from it. And so I think that if I could give any advice, it would be like consistency is key, and I hear that all the time and I'd roll my eyes. I'm like yeah, yeah, yeah, I know that. But like I think all of my growth has come from being consistent. And when I'm not consistent, then six months later, I'm like man. If I was only consistent, I'd be this far now, and so I think that that would be my no matter what it is right.
Speaker 2:We underestimate the little changes and how they add up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's, I think, kind of a point that we do really well at Lead is we have our platform that helps you do all of those things. It's small tools that add up, because then what you can say is like huh, I'm struggling with confidence. Oh yeah, remember when I did that activity, I did this reflection and it was all about these small habits to help me progress forward, and I think that that's just something that why I'm so passionate about that is because I used to take big steps and then I'd get mad at myself and then I would have to start all over or I just quit and I just don't want that anymore. So I think that that's the biggest thing I also see with my clients Makes sense.
Speaker 2:Um, what should someone start thinking about? Or, sorry, how should someone start thinking about their goals for this year If they haven't already? You talked about already breaking it into smaller pieces. Any other tips and tools for how they can do that?
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I'll just I will just plug again the platform, because I think that that's like one of the things that just like really makes me happy is when you are just like, okay, I'm trying to think, whiteboard it right, like here's the things that I want to accomplish in the year, but then having a tool to help you.
Speaker 2:So what are?
Speaker 1:the skills I need to do that. Yeah, 100%. I love that because I think that that's the biggest thing is like I could tell you all of the goals that I have. I used to have and I think I did a podcast on this like I used to have like 25 goals in a year right, I remember us having 25 goals at Lead 2.
Speaker 1:Yes, I know Ab, and like I had all these things because I'm a visionary, and blah, blah, blah. And then I would get six months later and I'd be like, well, we have to change this because I didn't have enough time or capacity to do it. So it's like taking it back to not just small, but like what are your two to three? Like if you can have more things that you want to do, but it's like if this happens, that's great, but like what are the three things I want to do? And like you said a great point where you're talking about skills, like I think a lot of the goals that I have to I want personally or professionally, it's skill-based, like confidence, overcoming my limiting beliefs, imposter syndrome, gaining a positive mindset, because that negative downworld spiral can take over. And so when people are thinking about their goals, it's also like not just I want to have more freedom or more flexibility, like what's the skill that you need to have in that? Because it's literally going to have to change your life, like your lifestyle might have to change because of that.
Speaker 1:You know I was sharing this on a recent or a podcast we did in 2024 about like one of my core values is freedom, and I think we've established things that lead to allow me to have more freedom to do what I'm good at Right Like freedom to me doesn't mean that I'm like sitting on the couch doing nothing. Right Like freedom to me doesn't mean that I'm like sitting on the couch doing nothing. Right. It's freedom to do certain things, and so those are goals that, like overarching, I think are important, but I think it goes back to what are the skills and then where are the tools and resources to help me, because it's great to talk about them, but then the actual action, and I think that's where our platform is really powerful and it's helped me.
Speaker 1:I use our platform, and I think that's where our platform is really powerful and it's helped me. I use our platform. I recently was just working on my core values and someone. I was talking to someone the other day and they're like well, what are your strengths? And I was like, you know, I haven't really revisited those in a while, and so I like went to our platform and I was able to work on those, which is, you know, really I think it's like practice what you preach as well when it comes to those things.
Speaker 2:I think you're bringing up a good point that you don't get to check these off the list. Yes, it's not like confidence achieved. I know we've talked about this before. Life throws you different things and you may be feeling oh, my habits have been really, really strong. February hits and maybe the glimmer fell off of it and the habits aren't feeling. Okay, let's go back. Tiny habits, you can kind of take it again Confidence.
Speaker 2:Something happens in your life you can revisit, but I think what you're talking about that's cool is you're saying this is where I want to be, but what do I need to do to get a different result? Do I need to learn something? Do I need to have a new habit, new skill? You know so many people. Fitness is always a big one in the new year, right? What does that mean? Maybe it's your mindset that you have to change so that this time's different. You know it's the gym, it's going, but it's also the mindset. You know what are some of those works. I like how you broke that down into some of those different pieces.
Speaker 1:I'll go off of that too. I think what's also like a good reflection all of that and something that we even put in the platform is like well, what has worked in the past Right and what hasn't Like. As you were even talking about fitness, I used to like block my calendar to work out at this time that I'm like I don't actually feel like it right now, but I will. I know I'll have energy later. So it's like also that flexibility a little bit and noticing what worked and what didn't before. Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:We had a Brene Brown fan in here. So what is the lesson the universe keeps putting in front of you? Because you need to keep learning this. When I heard it on her podcast before, oh my gosh, it was like a dagger. I love this question.
Speaker 1:I, I'm laughing because I think that that's like one thing, that like I have a friend that I always talk to and I'll be like, why does this keep happening?
Speaker 2:to me like what do I?
Speaker 1:have to learn. So I'm laughing because I'm literally thinking about like there's a lot of those things, and I'm going to go back to my word control, for a second of like. As a visionary, you can visualize how you want things to go, and it doesn't always go as planned. And control is something that I think the universe has continued to like throw into my plate of. Like girlfriend, like you don't need to control everything, like everything's going to work out the way that it's supposed to work out. You're going to learn from a mistake.
Speaker 1:It might not go how you want it, but there's also power in learning from your mistakes. Like I'm going to not even say fail, but like just kind of like not have it go as you want. And I think for me, the universe has continued to say like when you start controlling too much, you're out of whack and out of alignment of who you are. And so I've noticed that every time I like really start to control and you've probably seen this in my own like style sometimes, when I start to get into things like, I'm not happy because I'm not being true to who I am, and so I think the universe is going to keep teaching me that until I like, really let go and like it's funny, because I have a client who I'm working on with these things and I'm just getting mirrored.
Speaker 1:So hard because I'm like yep, I know exactly how you feel right now and it takes time, yeah, um. But I think I think the best thing is when the universe keeps giving you these lessons. You get to choose. And I think for me, I think I'm kind of grateful I kept getting the lesson because it's like, well, okay, you're gonna, it's going to keep happening, yeah, or you get to practice, yes, or you need to change, right, like back to what we just said about skills and tools and stuff, like I had to look at it differently.
Speaker 1:I needed a different skill, I needed different people in my life to say, like whoa, time out, like you're being a little dramatic here, right? So, yeah, I think that I love that Brene Brown asked that question Also. Like got to ask that question also. Like gut check to anybody listening to that, because it's like what is the universe trying to? Like, what is, what is that thing that keeps coming up for you? That you're like I just I'm done with this lesson. And I recently had a friend she's really going through that right now. She goes, I keep getting the same lesson and she's like I need to just sit with it and I need to reflect on it and like watching her sit and reflect I was like, oh, that's so uncomfortable, but like you know, because I know that feeling. But watching her sit and reflect I was like, oh, that's so uncomfortable, but like you know, because I know that feeling.
Speaker 1:But watching her even like change through that has been really cool. So I think when we actually do something about it, it's life changing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. What's a book or a podcast speaking of life changing? That's changed your perspective this year.
Speaker 1:So I'll share what the books I read in 2024. I got a good list that I'm going to read this year, but in 2024, I read the Light Work by Jessica Zwig, and she wrote this beautiful book about like how she was in burnout and how she found herself again, and she talked a lot about like how change is hard but like it's also like beautiful at the same time, and I think that that really resonated with me because we went through a lot of change at lead, and so I think for me, like I didn't ever think I had struggles with change, but I think what my biggest aha was from that book was that like I either I get to choose. You know how, how you move through things to get to where you want to be. I think that was one, and then another one I read was buy back your time, and that one was really cool because it's good. It's good for founders to really look at like well, where do you really want to spend your time and are you self sabotaging that for yourself? And so it really walks you through some patterns to help you kind of buy back what's good for you and then allow your team to thrive.
Speaker 1:So I ended the year with that one. When you read if anybody wants to read that, I'll put it in the show notes it's a big aha of like oh, I should have read this eight months ago, right, like I was like, oh, oh. And the book I'm reading right now is zone of genius, because everybody knows I love focusing on that and that's by Gay Hendricks, so I'll give more updates on that one. And then you said podcast and I will say so for a while. It's really hard to listen to my own voice, so I wasn't listening to our podcast.
Speaker 1:And then I started to and honestly I'm so grateful that I'm listening to my own podcast, because a lot of like it's also good for me to hear back some of the things that I've said.
Speaker 1:Like we did one on boundaries and you know feedback and things like that, and I'm like yeah, like I had great guests over the last year too, exactly, and so even their voices, and I'm like man, so many people are so smart and intelligent, it's so cool to learn back from them. So I think, like also a podcast, I would say, is ours, and I would say like listening back to different episodes, especially when we're just I always say like one pops out when we're really struggling with an area and we're like this is mine today and that's great. Yeah, Taking care of your health isn't always easy, but it should at least be simple. That's why, for the last three to four years, I have been drinking AG1 every day, no exceptions. It is just one scoop mixed in with water once a day, every day, and it makes me feel energized and ready to take on the day. That's because each serving of AG1 delivers my daily dose of vitamins, minerals and probiotics plus more. It's a powerful, healthy habit. That's also very simple, and I like simple.
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Speaker 2:So switching gears a little bit into leadership. What's a leadership challenge you faced recently and how did you handle it?
Speaker 1:We're going to laugh about this one a little bit, probably. So I think the biggest challenge I had in 2024 was I'm going to keep saying control and letting. I don't love the word letting go, because I never let go of like what our vision is, but I've allowed other people to step up in their strengths.
Speaker 2:Well, and I think you let go of the how.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's a good one to say yeah.
Speaker 2:It's not that you let go of the what yes, because in your role like that is your role yes, the what in creating and being the founder is the what yes. But I think you loosened the grip on the how yes, great point it took me a year.
Speaker 1:It took me a year and I know Kelsey can attest to that it took me about a year to be like but this is the way I've always done it. But like and I think I'm going to I'll just steal the words that you always say there's got to be a better way, and I think that that was something that I really had to just be okay with. So that's a lesson. I think I learned a lot in leadership and just like in myself is to let go of control. Like I hired people because of their strengths and back to even my personal development is like if I want to focus on what I'm really good at, like you have to let go and trust and just know like it's not going to go the way that you've always done it. That's going to be awkward for yourself, for the clients that you've had forever, for the people that you serve, but that doesn't mean it's bad. It just means it's different. And back to change like.
Speaker 1:I think that's just as a leader. It's hard for people just struggle with it right, and so I also had to learn, like how to bring people to the culture changes that we wanted to make, and I think we even got feedback at the end of the year of something to keep doing was investing in our culture, because people feel that when they see the team commodity. So I think in leadership I've learned a lot about that. It's funny because in corporate, when I worked in corporate, it's just so different than when you have an entrepreneur like non-profit and so that was like I couldn't do apples to apples, it was really like apples to bananas like in the style of leadership and how leadership does doesn't fit, for it's not the same for everybody.
Speaker 1:yeah, so I think that was my biggest lesson and I think I'm so like learning it. But I think in the last couple of months I use the word surrender a lot and I don't know if it's surrender or just like. You know what I really just want to focus on what I'm good at and having a team that allows me to, and then I have to do that back though, right? So I think it's like this back and forth thing, anything you would add.
Speaker 2:No, I think you nailed it. I think the piece that I've noticed that's been neat with the team is it takes a little bit to find your niche and to find your way. True, yes, because we kind of we brought team members in because of certain strengths, but they were transferable skills, not necessarily like you've done this exact job before skill. Yes, you've done this exact job before skill. Yes, and I think that that's when you talk about the how and people kind of figuring out it doesn't happen like that. Berkey would be really disappointed in my snap just then.
Speaker 2:But you know, but like it doesn't happen super quick necessarily, and so I think we've given space to kind of figure out what is that? Because the way you've done it before, you had to do it because you had a small team, yeah, of one or two maybe Right Exactly and so when you say a better way, it doesn't necessarily mean like the wrong, it was wrong. It was just the amount of time and space that you had for that capacity no-transcript.
Speaker 1:I know what I want, but I don't know how to get there, and then I don't really want to focus there, and so I think that that was an ego that I had to like pull out a little bit of like I don't need my hand in everything, and I think it's just a conversation I had to have with myself, because no one else was putting that pressure on me. Right, I was doing that to myself as a leader.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think a lot of what you're talking about is trust, and that's our last like leadership question that got submitted was what's one way leaders can foster trust in their teams.
Speaker 1:So I think one of the things that really comes with trust is open communication in a two-way street. So I think that that's one of the things that we did really well in 2024 is I have a team that's very. None of you guys are quiet in like a good way, right, like in a good way of like just because you don't agree with me, like you're not just like going forward with it, like you'll tell me your why, and I think then we can find middle ground. And I think trust also comes with people not being scared to give me feedback. You know, and it's hard when you're a leader and like people are like how do I give this feedback to my leader? Because I need them to change this way so that it works for me.
Speaker 1:So I think trust comes from just like building those relationships this way so that it works for me. So I think trust comes from just like building those relationships. And then also, like we've talked about this, like you can have hard conversations, but you can also be a cheerleader too, and finding that balance a little bit, because I do think it goes both ways. You need to like have hard conversations with the team, like not everybody's perfect, but you also need to be able to say like, hey, like, amazing job on this, or like, and not taking the credit for it like knowing it was a team effort. I mean, we have a small team still, and so it's like when people see a project it's literally everybody's hand had touched that at some point, but there was someone who took the big piece and the big chunk of it.
Speaker 1:So how do you build that trust? To know like they got it, you know, and then being able to say that out loud, I think does a little bit. And trust comes with time, like you know. I think it comes with time and also one of the things that probably you've realized too is like we all came from different places, so like and everybody listening, like we all have different leaders, and so you also have to realize, like they might be coming from a leader that they didn't trust or didn't trust them, and so you have to figure out how to break those barriers down so that they feel safe, but also feel like okay, these are the goals. Like I want you to feel safe, but I also want you to like meet these, like you know, be accountable, be accountable.
Speaker 1:Yes, and finding that balance with that communication where don't be scared and we've talked about this Don't be scared to own it, like hey, I made a mistake. We talk about those Like yep, that didn't go as planned, but just owning it and then pivoting. I think that builds trust too, because then I trust that if you make a mistake you're going to tell me Yep, you know.
Speaker 2:Yep, absolutely so. Switching into confidence. What's one thing people underestimate about building true confidence?
Speaker 1:So I think it's kind of what you said earlier. It's not a check the box thing, right, guys? I wish it was, I wish that I could tell you, like this is exactly it, and then you'll be set for life. But I think what happens with confidence is having the tools, first and foremost. So when people are like Lisa, I'm lacking confidence, it's like well, what are your basic tools that you can pull out of your toolbox to help you? Because I think what we have to do is start with the basics and then I can build deeper on specific topics and scenarios. But if you can't even like work on certain skills, then that's going to like frustrate you through the whole process.
Speaker 1:I also think confidence is a very big word and Kelsey and I talk about this a lot where there's a variety of skills that help you build your confidence, like, yeah, overcoming limiting beliefs, how is your self-esteem? You know, how are you with creating habits and setting goals? Like all of these little things. Also, who are you hanging out with? Right, it's all these little pieces. And so I always say, like, if you can put confidence in the middle and put words around it of like, here's the tools and skills that I need to grow, your confidence will shine. It's just small steps to get there and there are still moments where, like I would say like if you met me 10 years ago I had no confidence, meet me now. I have confidence. But the confidence can still get diminished a little bit depending on like oh man, I really messed that up. Or like you can play the games, but now that I have the tools, it doesn't stick around as long yeah.
Speaker 2:I think you can also have confidence in different areas of your life. So if you can tap into something that you do feel confident in, it's like well, why. And you can tap into something that you do feel confident in, it's like well, why? And you can almost reverse engineer Okay, I had these skills in that area. You might be telling yourself a story that you don't have it over here, right, you know you can kind of check yourself, or oh, I do or I will, but it just takes time.
Speaker 2:That can be some of the things too. Yeah, 100%, I agree. What's your take on faking it till you make it, as it relates to confidence?
Speaker 1:Oh, breathe deeply, Lisa. I actually don't love faking till you make it. I think it's because I truly, truly believe we all have it in us and I really also want people to be authentic. So I think for a long time I was like, yep, I faked it and I made it. And now I'm on stage, right, because I do a lot of keynotes.
Speaker 1:But what I realized is that whole time people saw something in me, so I was never faking it. I was being authentic to who I was. I wasn't believing in my own confidence, and so I think that it's okay to tell ourselves whatever scenario or slogan that we need to tell ourselves, but I truly believe everybody has something inside of them that's just kind of like sitting there being like I want it to come out. I want it to come out and we know those things. We're just also unsure sometimes, and so I don't love the faking piece because I want people to be authentic. But I also think it's like, hey, just being real with yourself, like I know where I want to be. I'm not there yet, but I'm going to start here and I'm going to do little things to get there, and every time I might have a saying of like okay, you're one step closer. You're one step closer to where you eat Doesn't mean that you're faking it. You have the skill. It's just growing in that skill. I would say.
Speaker 2:Switching gears a little bit into well-being, ok. So what's something you stopped doing recently for the sake of your mental health? You've talked a lot about us walking the walk, so what's something that snuck up on you that you had to stop doing?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think a few different things.
Speaker 1:So, first off, I had to start looking at my calendar and saying no to things that no longer was serving me, and that was tough, because there are a lot of things that are really fun and that I like to do, and they're networking and they help us build our company.
Speaker 1:But I also have to look at where my energy is spent, and I think, for my mental health, that's where I really had to focus, and especially, as you know, my husband's only at home, so much with his job.
Speaker 1:I had to look at, like, choosing where I spent my time, and so I think what the biggest thing I stopped doing in 2024 was feeling this guilt of obligation and like sure, in my job we all have things we have to do, that like we don't love, but I would just say, for my mental health, it's like overextending myself with those things and just being honest with myself, of like, is that bringing value or is that something I just did for years and feel like I continue to have to do right? And so I think I'm still trying to find that balance a little bit. I think it will always change in my life, but it's something now where I'm still trying to find that balance a little bit. I think it will always change in my life, but it's something now where I'm just way more clear on and I'm also OK with, like I don't want to do anything right now and that's.
Speaker 2:OK too.
Speaker 1:I need to re-energize myself.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely, and reframing what it means to give yourself that space, exactly, exactly. How do you deal with the pressure of being a role model for others? I know you get a lot of texts and calls and different things.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, so first off, I love being a role model. I think it's one of the coolest aspects of my job is that people look to me as the expert when it comes to confidence and leadership, and that's what I want to be known for. It's where I spent most of my time. I think the hardest part of being a role model is when you do have hard days, when you know you aren't walking the walk because you are going through a tough transition and you know what to do, but you're like I need 48 hours, and then you just feel, like am I being a fraud, right? And I know that that's not true, but those are the stories that can come up sometimes for people in those aspects, and I think for me, I'm honored to be the role model.
Speaker 1:I think sometimes, though, it's like what's the perception that I have to portray all the time? And I think in 2024, that was my realization of like be me right, like it's so easy on film and all of that to like be so professional that you're not yourself. And I like realized like where's Lisa's laughter, where's the crazy stuff that my friends have been friends with me for for so long and look up to me for? And then just giving real, authentic advice versus like what I think that they need to hear, and just being honest with that, I think, has really helped me. So it's hard to be a role model, because you feel like you don't want to let anybody down but but at the same time, like I also know that like being real and authentic to yourself is like a game changer and that's who we want to look up to.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly. Well, and I think the podcast has served as that. So many people want to give the before and the after. They don't want to talk about the lesson that they're learning in between. And I think that the Confident podcast has been fun to listen to, because I even listened to it as a snapshot into like, oh okay, that's what's been going on in that head. We haven't talked about you know or whatnot, but it is kind of cool because you're talking about that in between, it's easy to say, oh, I went through this and this is what I did in X, y and Z lesson. It's harder to sit and be like I'm still sitting with this or I'm like this came up again, or you know, here's what I'm doing. But I'm by no means on the other side of something and I'm using the podcast as an example. But social media is so just like quick, you know, hit, here's what's going on. It can be hard to not see that full story.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and then, like I think about all of these like famous people and I think about like we see, like when they maybe go through something really hard, and you're like wait, but you've put this persona on, and I think that that's one thing I've learned is like I don't want to ever like shock someone by like not being me Right, and also I think too, with what I teach, I have to do that as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. What's one underrated way to boost your mental and physical well-being?
Speaker 1:Oh, there's no life hacks as we like to say yeah.
Speaker 2:What's? What's something that's underrated?
Speaker 1:Sleep, yes, I feel that when I want to change everything in my life.
Speaker 2:I just need to go to bed and then see if that feeling still stands in the morning.
Speaker 1:Yes, Right, Like totally, I just had a coaching client Actually we were just talking about that and I was like you just need to get like some sleep, take a nap, Like, and I promise you like you'll feel better. I think that that's the most unrated thing, because I think for me, like we all just trying, like when we're in a funk, we just want to change everything in that moment my husband will be like what did that? Where'd that come from, right? And then I'll like wake up in the morning.
Speaker 1:I'm like so in my sleep I reflected right, cause I like finally, just like was at peace, you know, and I think then that's the one thing that I think is underrated, and I used to not sleep a lot. I used to think like grind was more important, so I'd go to bed late, wake up early and what I have found is I'm a way better leader when I get sleep and then I and I can focus in meetings and I can focus when I'm keynoting as well.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So we had a lot, of, a lot of different types of questions. Anything to close out that you haven't asked, that maybe you've gotten via text message or other channels that didn't come up.
Speaker 1:I think the biggest thing is is like what I hear a lot is from adults that are always looking at like, how do I support other people? Yeah, and I think one thing that I would say to everybody is like, first, how dare you supporting yourself? Because I think what I do a lot of is like I'm doing a lot of support for other people, like that's my career and I love it, but like I have to start with myself first, because I can't give someone advice and be like, yeah, I'm not even doing that Right, or things like that. And you know, I get a lot of even parents that will reach out about their kids and I'm always like, well, are you doing those things? Like you can't expect that of your kid if you're not doing it, you can't expect that of your coworker if you're not doing it, because we're role models.
Speaker 2:I was going to say I think you underestimate the impact you might have in doing something. You talked about clearing your calendar and saying no Like. How many times maybe has someone said like I didn't even realize I could say no to that, or maybe the way you did it prompted them to go oh okay, like I had saw the interview for someone that went back up and said I'm sorry, my coffee is wrong, would you mind remaking it?
Speaker 2:And somebody was like you can do that, so you never know who might be listening and how that might impact them Way more than saying you should do X, y and Z.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly, and I think it's all reframing to what we were talking about earlier and choosing for ourselves. At the end of the day, if I'm not happy, I'm never going to be able to give. I'm going to resent everybody else. I'm like, oh, now they're happy and I'm not happy, like I don't want that for people. So I think that that's how I would close out and I would also just say to all of you guys listening in today I'm just like we're here for you, like I will always be here for you.
Speaker 1:Kelsey is, my team is. There are so many resources out in this world, and I think one thing I'm proud of here at lead is is that we have the experts who have built this platform to help people and support them. I'm going through real time with you. What I'm going through, and that will never change, and I think it's just finding people that you're like I want them in my community, I want to help them, I want to show up for them, and so, again, you know, one of the things I'll just say with the platform, just to kind of close out, is we give a code out every time for this podcast of like we want you guys on there, we want you to enjoy it. We want you to know like hey 2025 came in hot, I know right after the holidays, but I'm here to support you, as well as the team.
Speaker 1:So, as I always say at the end of all of the podcasts, continue to spread love and kindness to everybody, and that includes yourself. So kindness to everybody and that includes yourself. So thanks for tuning in today and have a great day. Thank you for joining me on this episode of the Confident Podcast. If today's episode resonated with you, head over to leadconfidentlyorg for today's show notes, along with discounts to our services. Don't forget to hit the subscribe button, leave a review and follow us on Instagram and YouTube. At the Confident Podcast, your feedback means the world to me and it helps more people discover the show. And hey, if you're feeling inspired to dive deeper, let's connect. You can find me on Instagram at Lisa Tarkington Official. Drop me a message and let's explore how I can support your journey to confidence and leadership. Remember you have the power to choose confidence every single day. Keep showing up, keep striving and keep believing in your potential. I'm cheering you on and I'll see you next time.
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